Skip to main content

Priorities

I know myself.  When I get stressed, the first thing to go is any sense of priority.  I always have a million projects going, and the closer I get to the completion of any one of them, the less I want to focus appropriately on it. The new ones are more fun. I know that about myself, but it's a hard habit to break.

I am performing the Christopher Rouse Oboe Concerto with the South Bend Symphony in 10 days.  I am talking about it for the newspaper tomorrow, I'm filming a promotional video on Friday, and I need to prepare my talking points for these. I need to keep playing it daily to make sure that my ducks stay in their row. I should probably put out a blog post and a FaceBook announcement and maybe a newsletter promoting the concert. My costuming could use a little more attention.

But what's really interesting to me, and what I'm dying to focus on, is the redecoration of my oboe studio which will happen sometime this summer. I would far rather surf around on Pinterest looking for ideas or begin to sketch out the design of my new reed desk than actually think about the big performance I have coming up.

I'd rather think about the structure and rollout of the price increase which is coming to my reed business next month.  I'd rather think about sending promotional emails to teachers about Oboe Reed Boot Camp, which is August 6-7.  I'd MUCH rather start working on the music for my upcoming CD, Music That SHOULD Have Been Written for the Oboe.  I'd even rather read reviews about new printer/scanner/copiers (because I hate mine SO MUCH).

It feels annoying and boring and pedantic to have to keep dragging my focus back to the nearest-term project. I've been working on this piece for a year.  I've performed it with piano four times.  I worked with our Music Director on it yesterday.  I am absolutely looking forward to next week's rehearsals ad performance, but I'm mentally and emotionally ready to put it away and move on.

This is normal, this phase of the cycle, but I haven't found a way to make peace with it.  What I will do is obsessively list the things I have to do, and do them, and get them done... and wait for the end of the day when I can escape into those fun printer reviews once more, and dream of the time - coming soon - when I can throw my whole self into a NEW project once more.

Oh.  And don't miss this May 7 concert.  The Rouse is spectacular, the South Bend Symphony is a great orchestra, and despite my grouching I cannot wait to perform!  Details HERE.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Blog has MOVED

 Have you been waiting ... and waiting ... and WAITING for a new Prone Oboe post?  Don't wait here anymore!  The blog has moved to https://jennetingle.com/prone-oboe/  and will not be updated here on Blogger anymore.  Please come and check me out there!  I love you all - stay safe out there!  Jennet
Post a Comment
Read more

How Do You WISH You Could Describe Your Reeds?

In Reed Club last Monday, we took a moment before we started scraping to set some intentions.  We each said one word - an adjective to describe what we WANTED our reeds to be.  An aspirational adjective. Efficient was a word that came up, and Consistent . Dark and Mysterious . Mellow . Predictable .  Trustworthy .  Honest .  BIGGER . Reed affirmations actually felt helpful - both in the moment and in the results we found as we worked.  I don't know why that surprises me - I set intentions at the beginning of the year, at the beginning of the month, at the beginning of a run, in the morning before I work.  I love a good affirmation.  I love WORDS.  But I'd sort of forgotten about the possibility of applying one to the mundane work of reed-making.   You don't have to know exactly how to GET to that result.  But having clarity in your mind about what that result is?  Helps you to stop going down unhelpful rabbit holes...
2 comments
Read more

Micro Rests

 For oboists, endurance is a huge problem.  We can play an endlessly long phrase, because of the way the instrument is constructed, but we can really only do that a few times in a row before our embouchure starts to get fatigued.  We develop a buildup of air that feels exhausting to hold onto, and the thought of sustaining that kind of energy over  an entire page of music, much less a 45 minute recital program, is intimidating.    There's almost always a lesson, a week or two before a jury or a recital, where my student comes in and says, "I just can't DO this! I can play every detail in my music, but I can't put the whole thing together!  My mouth comes right off the oboe when I try - I'm going to fall apart in front of the audience, and it's going to be terrible!"  Look, I'm putting this on my students now - but there's a moment a week or so before MY performances that feels exactly the same! I have not outgrown this moment of panic. And at that...
Post a Comment
Read more